ivry man that took a dollar iv a bribe is sent down th' r-road. Thim
that takes two goes on th' comity iv th' wave iv rayform.

"It sthruck th' r-road las' week. Darcey, th' new polisman on th' bate,
comes in here ivry night f'r to study spellin' an' figgers. I think
they'll throw him down, whin he goes to be examined. Wan iv th' wild
la-ads down be th' slough hit him with a brick wanst, an' he ain't been
able to do fractions since. Thin he's got inflammathry rheumatism
enough to burn a barn, an' he can't turn a page without makin' ye think
he's goin' to lose a thumb. He's got wife an' childher, an' he's on in
years; but he's a polisman, an' he's got to be rayformed. I tell him
all I can. He didn't know where St. Pethersburg was till I tould him it
was th' capital iv Sweden. They'll not give him th' boots on that
there question. Ye bet ye'er life they won't, Jawn.

"I seen th' aldherman go by yisterdah; an' he'd shook his dimon 'stud,
an' he looked as poor as a dhrayman. He's rayformed. Th' little
Dutchman that was ilicted to th' legislachure says he will stay home.
Says I, 'Why?' Says he, 'There's nawthin' in it.' He's rayformed. Th'
wather inspictor, that used to take a dhrink an' a seegar an' report
me two pipes less thin I have, turned me in las' week f'r a garden
hose an' a ploonge bath. He's rayformed. Th' wave iv rayform has
sthruck, an' we're all goin' around now with rubbers on.

"They've organized th' Ar-rchey Road Lexow Sodality, an' 'tis th' wan
institootion that Father Kelly up west iv th' bridge 'll duck his head
to. All th' best citizens is in it. Th' best citizens is thim that th'
statue iv limitations was made f'r. Barrister Hogan tol' me--an' a
dacint man, but give to dhrink--that, whin a man cud hide behind th'
statue iv limitations, he was all r-right. I niver seen it. Is that