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The Fifteen Comforts of Matrimony: Responses from Men by Various
page 14 of 51 (27%)
In Marriage-Bed protects us from all harm,
Their Innocence like Lambs and Doves appear,
Which make our Hearts and Minds quite void of Care.
No Sorrow can lay hold of Man or Wife,
Where Love and Virtue is the Rule of Life.


_Answer to the Third mock Comfort._

Oh! Monstrous Man, nay Beast, (I almost said)
What cursed Thoughts are got into thy Head?
To rail at those to whom thy Life is due,
No Mortal yet durst be so vile as you?
If whipping _Joan_ was here alive and stout,
You do deserve to be well whip'd about.
Ten thousand lashes shall adorn thy Bumb,
If ever such a whipping Lass should come.
'Tis strange a Woman shou'd be so envy'd,
Not only mock'd, but shamefully bely'd.
With bawdy Gossips, and the Lord knows what,
To Name a Child the Husband never got.
You call him Fool, and yet that Title claim,
And prove your self the Person you wou'd Name.
You know it is a Woman's due by Birth,
To Scold and Cry, next moment Joy and Mirth.
One minute smile, the very next a Frown,
Perhaps the next she knocks her Husband down.
But what does this to hinder higher Charms?
When Joys are fix'd between the Husband's Arms,
Such transports are out of the reach of thought,
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