whether there were two posts a day to London, he lugged in an arm-chair.

I get on better with WILLIAM. WILLIAM is a rubber--not of whist, _bien
entendu_, but of men. In build WILLIAM is pear-shaped, the upper part of
him, where you would expect to find the stalk, broadening out into a
perpetual smile. He has lived in the Baths twenty-three years, and yet his
gaiety is not eclipsed. If he has a foible it is his belief that he
thoroughly understands London and its ways.

"A ver big place," he remarked this morning, "where dey kills de ladees."

This reference not being immediately clear, WILLIAM assisted dull
comprehension by drawing his finger across his throat, and uttering a
jovial "click!" But it was only when, his eyes brimming over with fun, he
said, "YAK de Reeper," that I followed the drift of his remark.

It is gratifying to the citizen of London travelling abroad, to learn that
in the mind of the foreigner the great Metropolis is primarily and chiefly
associated with "JACK the Ripper" and his exploits.

"I rob you not hard," WILLIAM incidentally remarks, pounding at your chest
as if it were a parquet flooring he was polishing; "but I strong so I can
break a shentleman's ribs."

I make due acknowledgment of the prowess, being particularly careful to
refrain from expressing doubt, or even surprise. WILLIAM, always smiling,
repeats the assertion just as if I had contradicted him. Try to change
subject.

[Illustration: "I would break hees ribs!"]