Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 101, October 17, 1891 by Various
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page 3 of 46 (06%)
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all your little tricks, this machine is! "Fertile in imagination,
domesticated, thoughtful and persevering"--There's Aunt MARIA for yer! _General Chorus_. Good old Aunt MARIA! _Dolph_. There's a prophecy on blue paper from _Napoleon's Book of Fate_, gratis. (_Reads._) "Thy 'oroscope forewarns thee of a loss if thou lendest thy money." Just when I was going to borrow arf-a-crown off of her too! _Aunt Maria_. Ah, I didn't want no machine for _that_. 'Ow you can patronise such rubbidge, _I_ don't know! Tellin' characters by the colour of your 'air, indeed--it's told _mine_ all wrong, anyhow! _Dolph_. Well, you see, your 'air's so natural it would deceive _any_ machine! [_Movement on part of Aunt MARIA._ _Lottie_. Put in for 'ECTOR next, DOLPH, do. I want to hear what it says about him. _Dolph_. They don't keep _his_ colour in stock--afraid o' losing their insurance policy. "Red or orbun's" the nearest they can get to it. (_He puts in a penny in the "Red" slot._) Here's old 'ECTOR. (_Reads._) "The Gentleman with long red hair is of a restless disposition, constantly roving." Keep your eye on him, LOTTIE! "Impatient and fiery in temper"--_'Old_ 'im, two of yer?--"but for all that, is kind and loving." You _needn't_ 'old him--it's all right. "He is passionately fond of the fair sex." What _all_ of 'em, 'ECTOR? I'm ashamed of yer! "He is inclined to timidity"--Oo'd ha' thought it?--"but by reflection may correct it and pass for a man of courage." |
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