Easy let-off for a bogus "Promoter,"
Helping the ruin of hundreds for gain;
Six months for stealing a turnip or "bloater,"
Ditto for bashing a wife on the brain:
Sentences cut to one-twelfth on appealing,
Judges and juries at loggerheads quite!
Really each day brings some curious revealing,
Putting you, Ma'am, in a very strange light.
Take my advice, Ma'am, this bright New Year's morning,
Give a look up to your agents all round;
To some give the sack, and to others a warning;
The Public will back up your move, I'll be bound!

* * * * *

GREEK MEETS GREEK.--"What!" exclaimed an indignant scholar, who had
not peeped into a Classic for some forty years, "no more compulsory
Greek at our Universities! What are we coming to? All I can say is,
'_Absit omen_'!" "'Scuse me!" replied his friend, who was all for the
new learning, "but I should say, '_Absit Homer_'!"

* * * * *

SEASONABLE (AND SUITABLE) GOOD WISHES.

To a Card-player A Nappy }
To a Smart Girl A "Snappy" }
To a Flirt A "Chappy" }
To an Old Maid A Cappy }
To an Infant A Pappy }