Hard a lady's hand can strike!
Do you really mean a fella'
Is to dance; just when you like?
Why so savagely sarcastic,
That we will not "take the floor"
And account the "light fantastic"
An unmitigated bore?

You avow we're shy of marriage.
Is not that too hard again?
When a maiden wants a carriage,
And a mansion in Park Lane,
Diamonds, furs, and opera-boxes:
Although ardently one loves,
All the balance I've at Cox's
Wouldn't keep a girl in gloves.

* * * * *

"WILL YOU, WONT YOU?"

_(A Lay of the Lord Chancellor. Very latest Version, NOT from "Iolanthe."_)

[Illustration: _Lord Halsbury (to Bill Sikes)_. "IF YOU _DON'T_ SAY
ANYTHING, IT WILL GO AGAINST YOU; AND IF YOU _DO_, IT WILL BE ALL UP WITH
YOU!"]

["The Lord Chancellor declares himself the foe of any 'technical
system' which excludes 'anybody who knows anything about the facts from
the opportunity of stating what is the truth.' ... We may take it that