seamen.

Such, Mr. Hood, sir, is the prospect before us! And unless you, and
some of your friends who have influence at Court, can get up a giant
as a forlorn hope, it is all over with this ill-fated land.

In reference to your own affairs, sir, you will take whatever course
may seem to you most prudent and advisable after this warning. It
is not a warning to be slighted: that I happen to know. I am
informed by the gentleman who favours this, that you have recently
been making some changes and improvements in your Magazine, and are,
in point of fact, starting afresh. If I be well informed, and this
be really so, rely upon it that you cannot start too small, sir.
Come down to the duodecimo size instantly, Mr. Hood. Take time by
the forelock; and, reducing the stature of your Magazine every
month, bring it at last to the dimensions of the little almanack no
longer issued, I regret to say, by the ingenious Mr. Schloss: which
was invisible to the naked eye until examined through a little eye-
glass.

You project, I am told, the publication of a new novel, by yourself,
in the pages of your Magazine. A word in your ear. I am not a
young man, sir, and have had some experience. Don't put your own
name on the title-page; it would be suicide and madness. Treat with
General Tom Thumb, Mr. Hood, for the use of his name on any terms.
If the gallant general should decline to treat with you, get Mr.
Barnum's name, which is the next best in the market. And when,
through this politic course, you shall have received, in presents, a
richly jewelled set of tablets from Buckingham Palace, and a gold
watch and appendages from Marlborough House; and when those valuable