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Punch, Or The London Charivari, Volume 102, March 19, 1892 by Various
page 2 of 46 (04%)
Pray take them, too, as read."

But when the Auction did begin,
Bidders, alack! were lacking;
Back numbers hove in sight in shoals,
Yet seemed to have no backing.

"Then this," quoth he, "appears to be
The dismal situation;
Though from these speeches statesmen quote,
For them there's no quotation.

"The eye has 'heavenly rhetoric,'
But heavenly rhetoric now, 'tis plain,
Itself is all my eye.

"A penny! Really such a bid
I can't allow to pass;
A man who'd offer coppers here
Must be composed of brass.

"'Progress' I cannot well 'report,'
Unless this lot is bought in;
The only progress seems to be,
When there'll be no reportin'.

"Such priceless gems, such wretched bids!"
The hammer-man did shout;
"If you desire, I knock them down--
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