And she said, "Though they've thrown us
This Five-Shilling Bonus,
I cannot brook Two pounds fifteen!"

Comes a Broker outsider--
Who chanced to have spied her,
And "Options" and "Pools" he extols--
When he pictures the profit
(Commission small off it),
She cheerfully sells her Consols.

Then she starts operations
With fierce speculations
In Stocks of all manner and shape;
But whatever she chooses
Her "cover" she loses,
And sees it run off on the tape.

So alas! for Miss MUFFIT--
She now has to rough it,
And never gets jam with her tea;
While the Bucket-shop Dealer
Employs a four-wheeler,
Regardless of _L._ _S._ and _D._

* * * * *

"THE FROGS" AT OXFORD.

SCENE--_Parlour of Private House, Oxford._ TIME--_Quite