_The Cautious Man_ (_to the Commissionnaire_). How long can I stay in
for sixpence?

_The Commissionnaire_. Ten Minutes, Sir.

_The C.M._ Only ten minutes, eh? But, look here, how do I know
there'll be anything going on while I'm _in_ there?

_Comm._ You'll find out that from the instruments, Sir.

_The C.M._ Ah, I daresay--but what _I_ mean is, suppose there's
nothing _to hear_--between the Acts and all that?

_Comm._ Comp'ny guarantees there's a performance on while you're in
the room, Sir.

[Illustration: "How very distinctly you hear the dialogue, Sir, don't
you?"]

_The C.M._ Yes, but all these other people waiting to get in--How'm I
to know I shall get a _place_?

_Comm._ (_outraged_). Look 'ere, Sir, we're the National Telephone
Comp'ny with a reputation to lose, and if you've any ideer we want to
swindle you, all I can tell _you_ is--stop outside!

_The C.M._ (_suddenly subdued_). Oh--er--all right, thought I'd make
sure _first_, you know. Sixpence, isn't it?