it took th' lawyer f'r th' definse to call up another judge on th'
tillyphone. A judge listens to a case f'r days an' hears, while he's
figurin' a possible goluf score on his blotting pad, th' argymints iv
two or three lawyers that no wan wud dare to offer a judgeship to.
Gin'rally speakin', judges are lawyers. They get to be judges because
they have what Hogan calls th' joodicyal timp'ramint, which is why
annybody gets a job. Th' other kind people won't take a job. They'd
rather take a chance. Th' judge listens to a case f'r days an' decides
it th' way he intinded to. D'ye find th' larned counsel that's just
been beat climbin' up on th' bench an' throwin' his arms around th'
judge? Ye bet ye don't. He gathers his law books into his arms, gives
th' magistrate a look that means, 'There's an eliction next year', an'
runs down th' hall to another judge. Th' other judge hears his kick an'
says he: 'I don't know annything about this here case except what ye've
whispered to me, but I know me larned collague an' I wuddent thrust him
to referee a roller-skatin' contest. Don't pay th' fine till ye hear
fr'm me.' Th' on'y wan that bows to th' decision is th' fellow that won,
an' pretty soon he sees he's made a mistake, f'r wan day th' other coort
comes out an' declares that th' decision of th' lower coort is another
argymint in favor iv abolishing night law schools.

"That's th' way Jawn D. felt about it an' he didn't settle. I wondher
will they put him away if he don't pay ivinchooly? 'Twill be a long
sentence. A frind iv mine wanst got full iv kerosene an' attempted to
juggle a polisman. They thried him whin he come out iv th' emergency
hospital an' fined him a hundhred dollars. He didn't happen to have that
amount with him at th' moment or at anny moment since th' day he was
born. But the judge was very lenient with him. He said he needn't pay it
if he cuddent. Th' coort wud give him a letther of inthroduction to th'
bridewell an' he cud stay there f'r two hundhred days. At that rate