But it was to a strangely altered world that he went. Its glory had
vanished; it was desolate and empty, or so at least it seemed to him,
for he confounded the outer and the inner worlds, as it was his nature
and habit to do. It was in his soul that the change had taken place. The
face of a bad man and of an incomprehensible woman followed him through
the long furrows until the sun went down. He was vaguely conscious that
he had for the first time actually encountered those strenuous elements
which draw manhood from its moorings. He felt humiliated by the
recognition that he was living a dream life there in his happy valley;
and that there was a life outside which he could not master so easily.
That confidence in his strength and incorruptibility which he had always
felt began to waver a little. His innocence appeared to him like that of
the great first father in the garden of Eden, before his temptation, and
now that he too had listened to the voice of the serpent and had for the
first time been stirred at the description of the sweetness of the great
tree's fruit, there came to him a feeling of foreboding as to the
future. He was astonished that such characters as those he had just
seen did not excite in him loathing and repulsion. Why could he not put
them instantly and forever out of his mind? How could they possess any
attractiveness for him at all--such a blatant, vulgar man or such an
ignorant, ah! but beautiful, woman; for she was beautiful!
Yes--beautiful but bad! But no--such a beautiful woman could not be bad.
See how interested she was about the "inner light." She must be very
ignorant; but she was very attractive. What eyes! What lips!

Thoughts which he had always been able to expel from his mind before,
like evil birds fluttered again and again into the windows of his soul.
For this he upbraided himself; but only to discover that at the very
moment when he regretted that he had been tempted at all, he also
regretted that he had not been tempted further.