Different Girls by Various
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page 11 of 202 (05%)
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world of memories, there seemed something small, even common, about the
younger generation to which she belonged,--something lacking in significance and dignity. For example, it had been her dream, as it is the dream of every true woman, to be a mother herself: and yet, somehow--though she would not admit it in so many words--when her young married sisters came with their babies, there was something about their bustling and complacent domesticity that seemed to make maternity bourgeois. She had not dreamed of being a mother like that. She was convinced that her old mother had never been a mother like that. "They seem more like wet-nurses than mothers," she said to herself, with her wicked wit. Was there, she asked herself, something in realization that inevitably lost you the dream? Was to incarnate an ideal to materialize it? Did the finer spirit of love necessarily evaporate like some volatile essence with marriage? Was it better to remain on idealistic spectator such as she--than to run the risks of realization? She was far too beautiful, and had declined too many offers of commonplace marriage, for such questioning to seem the philosophy of disappointment. Indeed, the more she realized her own situation, the more she came to regard what others considered her sacrifice to her mother as a safeguard against the risk of a mediocre domesticity. Indeed, she began to feel a certain pride, as of a priestess, in the conservation of the dignity of her nature. It is better to be a vestal virgin than--some mothers. And, after all, the maternal instinct of her nature found an ideal outlet in her brother's children--the two little motherless girls who |
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