be said by scoffers, and it has been said to-day, in my presence, that I
didn't know enough to even milk a cow. I deny the allegation; show me the
allegator. If any gentleman present has got a cow here with him, and I can
borrow a clothes-wringer, I will show you whether I can milk a cow or not.
Or, if there is a cheese mine here handy, I will demonstrate that I
can--_runnet_.

The manufacture of cheese and butter has been among the earliest
industries. Away back in the history of the world, we find Adam and Eve
conveying their milk from the garden of Eden, in a one-horse wagon to the
cool spring cheese factory to be weighed in the balance. Whatever may be
said of Adam and Eve to their discredit in the marketing of the products
of their orchard, it has never been charged that they stopped at the pump
and put water in their milk cans. Doubtless you will remember how Cain
killed his brother Abel because Abel would not let him do the churning. We
can picture Cain and Abel driving mooly cows up to the house from the
pasture in the southeast corner of the garden, and Adam standing at the
bars with a tin pail and a three-legged stool, smoking a meerschaum pipe
and singing "Hold the fort for I am coming through the rye," while Eve sat
on the verandah altering over her last year's polonaise, and winking at
the devil who stood behind the milk house singing, "I want to be
an angel." After he got through milking he came up and saw Eve blushing,
and he said, "Madame, cheese it," and she chose it.

[Illustration: A SCENE IN PARADISE.]

But to come down to the present day, we find that cheese has become one of
the most important branches of manufacture. It is next in importance to
the silver interest. And, fellow cheese-mongers, you are doing yourselves
great injustice that you do not petition congress to pass a bill to