credit for different qualities. Thus a terrific crack at the back of the
ear might produce so great an elevation of the organ of _combativeness_ as
might obtain for the greatest coward a reputation for the greatest courage;
and a thundering rap on the centre of the head might raise on the skull of
the veriest brute a bump of, and name for, _benevolence_.

* * * * *


"IT WAS BEFORE I MARRIED."

A BENEDICTINE LYRIC.

Well, come my dear, I will confess--
(Though really you too hard are)
So dry these tears and smooth each tress--
Let Betty search the larder;
Then o'er a chop and genial glass,
Though I so late have tarried,
I will recount what came to pass
I' the days before I married.

Then, every place where fashion hies,
Wealth, health, and youth to squander,
I sought--shot folly as it flies,
'Till I could shoot no longer.
Still at the opera, playhouse, clubs,
'Till midnight's hour I tarried;
Mixed in each scene that fashion dubs
"The Cheese"--before I married.