_Which rather spoils his little list--_
_His fifty daily cigarettes._

* * * * *

[Illustration: "SWOOPING FROM THE WEST."

[It is the intention of our new Ally to assist us in the patrolling of the
Atlantic.]]

* * * * *

[Illustration: ON AN OUTLYING FORT.

_Orderly Officer._ "ANYTHING SERIOUS TO REPORT, SERGEANT?"

_Sergeant._ "GUNNER JONES FEELS 'OMESICK, SIR, AND MAY HE SEND FOR 'IS
PARROT?"]

* * * * *

THE GENERAL.

Last night, as I was washing up,
And just had rinsed the final cup,
All of a sudden, 'midst the steam,
I fell asleep and dreamt a dream.
I saw myself an old, old man,
Nearing the end of mortal span,
Bent, bald and toothless, lean and spare,