Or what restorative apply?
A pinch be my resource;
Perchance the French are not polite,
And with my country wish to fight,
Then I must grieve perforce;

Or, if with doubt the bosom heaves.
The heart for Grecian sorrows grieves,
And pines to see them fail.
Such critics sometimes court the muse,
And I perchance the rhymes peruse,
Then heaves the breast with pain.

To soothe the mind in such an hour,
A pinch of snuff has ample power--
One pinch--all's well again.
A pinch of snuff delights again,
And makes me view with great disdain,
And soothes my patriot grief.

Thus for the list of human woes,
The pangs each mortal bosom knows,
I find in snuff relief:
It makes me feel less sense of sorrow,
When modern bards their verses borrow,
And soothes my patriot grief.

Then let me sing the praise of snuff--
Give me, ye gods, I pray, enough--
Let others boast their wine;