went to the barn and got a rope and put it under my jacket, and started
off to see Mary, whom I found sitting in the kitchen, smoking her pipe,
for smoking was as common among the girls as among the men. Mary, said I,
I was over here last night and saw you through the window sitting on Dan's
knee. Now, Mary, I want you to tell me at once whose you mean to be--mine
or Dan's? Dan's, she replied, with an important toss of her head, which
went through my very soul, like the shock from a galvanic battery. I
rested for a minute or so on an old oak table that stood by. Mary's answer
had unstrung every nerve in me, and left me so weak that I could scarcely
keep from falling. Now I was not at that time, and don't think I ever
shall be one of those fools who would cut off his nose to spite his face,
much less kill myself because a girl refused to love me. Life to me was
always preferable, under any circumstances; but in this case I played the
most dexterous card I had. Mary, said I sternly, if you don't give Dan up
and sware to be mine, I will hang myself this night. To this she replied,
hang on if you are fool enough, and continued smoking her pipe as though
not the least alarmed. I took out the rope from under my jacket, and got
upon a three-legged stool, and putting the rope first over the beam in the
ceiling, then made a slip-knot, and brought it down round my neck, taking
good care to have it short enough that it would not choke me, and in this
way I stood upon the stool for some considerable time, groaning and
struggling, and making every kind of noise that might make her believe
that I was choking or strangling; but still Mary sat deliberately smoking
her pipe with the utmost coolness, and seemed to take no notice of me or
what I was doing. I thought my situation worse now than if I had not
commenced this job at all. My object in pretending to hang myself was to
frighten Mary into compliance with my demand, and her conduct turned out
to be everything but what I had expected. I had thought that the moment I
ascended the stool she would have clung to me and tried to dissuade me
from committing suicide, and in this case my plan was to persist in