distress; I thought of neither food, drink or rest, for days and nights
together. Burning with a recollection of the wrongs man had done
me--mourning for the injuries my brethren were still enduring, and deeply
convicted of the guilt of my own sins against God. One evening, in the
third week of the struggle, while alone in my chamber, and after solemn
reflection for several hours, I concluded that I could never be happy or
useful in that state of mind, and resolved that I would try to become
reconciled to God. I was then living in the family of an Elder of the
Presbyterian Church. I had not made known my feelings to any one, either
in the family or out of it; and I did not suppose that any one had
discovered my feelings. To my surprise, however, I found that the family
had not only been aware of my state for several days, but were deeply
anxious on my behalf. The following Sabbath, Dr. Cox was on a visit in
Brooklyn to preach, and was a guest in the family; hearing of my case, he
expressed a wish to converse with me, and without knowing the plan, I was
invited into a room and left alone with him. He entered skilfully and
kindly into my feelings, and after considerable conversation he invited me
to attend his service that afternoon. I did so, and was deeply interested.

Without detaining the reader with too many particulars, I will only state
that I heard the doctor once or twice after this, at his own place of
worship in New York City, and had several personal interviews with him, as
the result of which, I hope, I was brought to a saving acquaintance with
Him, of whom Moses in the Law and the Prophets did write; and soon
connected myself with the church under his pastoral care.

I now returned with all my renewed powers to the great theme--slavery. It
seemed now as I looked at it, to be more hideous than ever. I saw it now
as an evil under the moral government of God--as a sin not only against
man, but also against God. The great and engrossing thought with me was,