times one must eat what one can get," and he swallowed the slug with a
wry face.

* * * * *

WELL-MEANT.

Extract from a New Zealand school-boy's letter:--

"We also had songs, the College song, and the Harrow School song, for
the special benifit (_sic_) of the Governor, who is an Etonian."

* * * * *

[Illustration:_Motor-Launch Officer_ (_who has rung for full-speed
without result_). "WHAT'S THE MATTER?"

_Voice from below_. "ONE OF THE CYLINDERS IS MISSING, SIR."

_Commander_. "WELL, LOOK SHARP AND FIND THE BALLY THING--WE WANT TO
GET ON."]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)

I was some way into _Thorgills of Treadholt_ (WARD, LOCK), thinking
what an unusually plausible and imaginative yarn it was, when I turned