fraternity, who, seeing the guns, were convinced that their journey was
only what they call "a few miles down the road," and they were speedily
surrounded by twenty or thirty of them, all with "excellent 'osses, vot
vould take their honours fourteen miles an hour." All men of business
are aware of the advantages of competition, and no one more so
than Jorrocks, who stood listening to their offers with the utmost
sang-froid, until he closed with one to take them to Streatham Church
for two shillings, and deliver them within the half-hour, which was a
signal for all the rest to set-to and abuse them, their coachman, and
his horse, which they swore had been carrying "stiff-uns" [14] all night,
and "could not go not none at all". Nor were they far wrong; for the
horse, after scrambling a hundred yards or two, gradually relaxed into
something between a walk and a trot, while the driver kept soliciting
every passer-by to "ride," much to our sportsmen's chagrin, who
conceived they were to have the "go" all to themselves. Remonstrance
was vain, and he crammed in a master chimney-sweep, Major Ballenger the
licensed dealer in tea, coffee, tobacco, and snuff, of Streatham
(a customer of Jorrocks), and a wet-nurse; and took up an Italian
organ-grinder to ride beside himself on the front, before they had
accomplished Brixton Hill. Jorrocks swore most lustily that he would
fine him, and at every fresh assurance, the driver offered a passer-by
a seat; but having enlisted Major Ballenger into their cause, they at
length made a stand, which, unfortunately for them, was more than the
horse could do, for just as he was showing off, as he thought, with a
bit of a trot, down they all soused in the mud. Great was the scramble;
guns, barrel-organ, Pompey, Jorrocks, driver, master chimney-sweep,
Major Ballenger, were all down together, while the wet-nurse, who sat at
the end nearest the door, was chucked clean over the hedge into a dry
ditch. This was a signal to quit the vessel, and having extricated
themselves the best way they could, they all set off on foot, and left