One evening, as we sat at dinner,
And strove our senses to deceive
By just imagining him thinner;

We heard a crack, a burst, a groan,
We felt a broadside round us battered,
We _saw_ his buttons fiercely blown
About our heads, and piecemeal scattered!

The suit had split; the boy was bare
Of clothes designed to last for ages;
We gave him notice then and there--
This _volume_, so to speak, of pages!

* * * * *

SONG TO BE SUNG IN HAYMARKET ORCHESTRA DURING OVERTURE.--"Oh, why
should we wait till to-morrow? See _Queen of Manoa_ to-night!"

* * * * *

ON A GUERNSEY EXCURSION CAR.

_The car, drawn by four horses, and crowded with Excursionists
on pleasure bent, is toiling up the steep streets of St. Peter
Port, when it comes to a sudden halt._

[Illustration: "Endeavours to assume a knowing and horsey
expression."]