Was jist a treat: 'er eyes was shinin' bright,
An' she'd grow'd ten years younger in a night.
Jist 'ere, Doreen she sez to me, "Good Lor,
Wot do yeh want _two_ plugs uv 'baccer for?"

I takes me pipe out uv me mouth an' stares,
An' stammers, "Must 'ave found a piece--somewheres."
But, by the way she smiles--so extra sweet--
I know she twigs me game, an' I am beat.
"Fancy," she sez. "Yeh're absent-minded, dear.
Sure there was nothin' else yeh wanted 'ere?"

"Nothin'," I sez, an' feels a first-prize fool;
An' goes outside, an' grabs the nearest tool.
It was the crosscut; so I works like mad
To keep me self-respeck from goin' bad.
"This game," I tells meself, "will do yeh good.
You ain't proficient, yet, at sawin' wood."




XII. JIM


Jim

"NOW, be the Hokey Fly!" sez Peter Begg.
"Suppose 'e comes 'ome with a wooden leg.
Suppose 'e isn't fit to darnce at all,