the Arethusa, "for we had been told there was a capital inn at La Fère.
Such a dinner as we were going to eat. Such beds as we were going to
sleep in, and all the while the rain raining on homeless folk over all
the poplared country-side. It made our mouths water. The inn bore the
name of some woodland animal, stag, or hart, or hind, I forget which.
But I shall never forget how spacious and how eminently comfortable it
looked as we drew near.... A rattle of many dishes came to our ears; we
sighted a great field of tablecloth; the kitchen glowed like a forge and
smelt like a garden of things to eat.

"Into this ... you are now to suppose us making our triumphal entry, a
pair of damp rag-and-bone men, each with a limp india-rubber bag upon
his arm. I do not believe I have a sound view of that kitchen; I saw it
through a sort of glory, but it seemed to me crowded with the snowy caps
of cook-men, who all turned round from their saucepans and looked at us
with surprise. There was no doubt about the landlady however; there she
was, heading her army, a flushed, angry woman, full of affairs. Her I
asked politely--too politely, thinks the Cigarette--if we could have
beds, she surveying us coldly from head to foot.

"'You will find beds in the suburb,' she remarked. 'We are too busy for
the like of you.'

"If we could make an entrance, change our clothes, and order a bottle of
wine I felt sure we could put things right, so I said, 'If we can not
sleep, we may at least dine,' and was for depositing my bag.

"What a terrible convulsion of nature was that which followed in the
landlady's face! She made a run at us and stamped her foot.