_Hairdresser_. "SAY THEN, SARE ZAT YOU ARE RASÉ--SHAVE,--IS IT THAT I
SHALL CUT YOU OFF YOUR 'AIR?"

_Mr. Brown_ (_an old-fashioned Englishman, on his first Visit
to Paris--startled_). "HEY! WHAT! CUT MY HAIR OFF! NONG,
MOSSOO--COMPRENNY?--NONG! DO YOU THINK I WANT TO LOOK LIKE ONE OF YOUR
FRENCH POODLES?"]

* * * * *

TO OUR GUERNSEY CORRESPONDENTS.

MR. PUNCH is sorry to find that his fancy sketch of a Guernsey Car
drive has been taken so seriously in some quarters as to give pain and
offence which were very far from being intended. He begs to assure the
honourable fraternity of Car-proprietors and drivers in the island,
that he did _not_ mean to suggest for a moment that there was the
slightest real danger to the public who patronise those highly popular
and excellently-conducted vehicles, or that any actual driver was
either intemperate or incompetent; and that, should such an impression
have been unfortunately produced--which he hopes is impossible--no one
would regret so unjust an aspersion more sincerely than _Mr. Punch_
himself.

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE GOLFER'S DREAM.]

* * * * *