Even certain professors, who are supposed to be immune from commercial
inducements are sometimes financially overcautious. A party of tourists
were watching Professor X as he exhumed the wrapt body of an ancient
Egyptian.

"Judging from the utensils about him," remarked the professor, "this
mummy must have been an Egyptian plumber."

"Wouldn't it be interesting," said a romantic young lady, "if we could
bring him to life?"

"Interesting, but a bit risky," returned Professor X. "Somebody might
have to pay him for his time."


MATRIMONIAL PROFUNDITY

A young planter in Mississippi had an old servant called Uncle Mose, who
had cared for him as a child and whose devotion had never waned. The
young man became engaged to a girl of the neighborhood who had a
reputation for unusual beauty and also for a very violent temper.
Noticing that Uncle Mose never mentioned his approaching marriage, the
planter said:

"Mose, you know I am going to marry Miss Currier?"

"Yassuh, I knows it."

"I haven't heard you say anything about it," persisted the planter.