Is that my pencil? Well, they _can't_ be paid.
Tell the Marines we have no forms to spare.
I cannot get these Ration States to square.
The Brigadier is coming round, they say.
The Colonel wants a man to cut his hair.
I think I _must_ be going mad to-day.

"These silly questions! I shall tell Brigade
This office is now closing for repair.
They want to know what Mr. Johnstone weighed,
And if the Armourer is dark, or fair?
I do not know; I cannot say I care.
Tell that Interpreter to go away.
Where is my signal-pad? I left it there.
I think I _must_ be going mad to-day.

"Perhaps I should appear upon parade.
Where is my pencil? Ring up Captain Eyre;
Say I regret our tools have been mislaid.
These companies would make Sir DOUGLAS swear.
A is the worst. Oh, damn, is this the _Maire?_
I'm sorry, Monsieur--_je suis désolé_--
But no one's pinched your miserable chair.
I think I _must_ be going mad to-day.

ENVOI.

"Prince, I perceive what CAIN'S temptations were,
And how attractive it must be to slay.
O Lord, the General! This is hard to bear.