_Mr. C._ (_to himself, as he departs rather sheepishly_). I've
_offended_ that girl--I could see she was wild at missing that Barn
Dance. I wish I _had_ danced it, I'm sure,--it would have saved me
several francs. It was all her own fault. However, I'll ask her for
a waltz another evening, and make it up to her _that_ way. Confound
those _Petits Chevaux_!

_Miss D._ AMY, he's gone,--and I _haven't_ danced and I haven't sat
out with him--and he can't' say it's _my_ fault either! (_She kisses
her hand to the Petits Chevaux inside._) Thanks, _ever_ so much, you
dear little beasts!

* * * * *

THE BRUMMAGEM BIRDCATCHER.

(_A LAY OF A LABOUR PROGRAMME_.) AIR--"_THE RATCATCHER'S DAUGHTER_."

[Illustration: _Brummagem Birdcatcher_ (_aside_). "AH! I FANCY I SHALL
HAVE THEM PRESENTLY!"]

In Vestminster not long ago there dvelt a lad named JOEY;
He vos not raised in Vestminster, but in a place more goey.
At snaring birds he vos a dab, of eggs (and plots) a hatcher;
And he vos called young Vistling JOE, the Brummagem Birdcatcher.

Young JOE of Grand Old VILL-I-AM, at fust vos pal most chummy,
But second fiddle vos not quite _the_ instrument for Brummy.
Says he, "Old VILL vants his own vay, the vicked old vote-snatcher!
But that arrangement vill not suit the Brummagem Birdcatcher!