Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 103, November 19, 1892 by Various
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statistics about the consumption of whiskey from the young lady who
ministered to travellers. The revelations now communicated, convinced BULGER that either Dr. MORRIS was not on the lines of Sir ANDREW CLARK, or, as an alternative, that his counsels were not listened to by travellers on that line. [Illustration] Arriving in the dusk, BULGER went to his inn, and next morning inquired as to the address of the Head of the Faculty. "I dinna ken," said an elderly person, to whom he appealed, "that the Professors had made TOM a Doctor, though it's a sair and sad oversicht, and a disgrace to the country, that they hae'na done sae lang syne. But I jalouse that your Doctor was jist making a gowk o' ye." "What!" said BULGER. "Jist playin' a plisky on ye, and he meant that TOM wad pit ye in the way o' becoming a player. Mon, ye're a bull-neckit, bow-leggit chiel', and ye'd shape fine for a Gowfer! Here's TOM." And, with this brief introduction, the old man strolled away. BULGER now found himself in the presence of Mr. MORRIS, whose courtesy soon put him on a footing of friendliness and confidence. He purchased, by his Mentor's advice, a driver, a cleek, a putter, a brassey, an iron, a niblick, and a mashy. Armed with these implements, which were "carried by an orphan boy," and, under the guidance of the Head of the Faculty himself, BULGER set forth on his first round. His first two strokes were dealt on the yielding air; his third carried no inconsiderable parcel of real property to some distance; but his fourth hit the ball, and drove it across the road. "As gude as a better," quoth the orphan boy, and bade BULGER propel the tiny sphere in the direction of a neighbouring rivulet. Into this affluent of the |
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