On what is chaste and what is rude;
Yet am I certain that my leg
Would not look right beneath a filibeg.

I love the Scot as being truly British;
Golf (and the Union) makes us one;
Yet to my nature, which is far from skittish
And lacks his local sense of fun,
There is a something almost foreign
About his strange attachment to the sporran.

So, when a bargain-sale is held of chattels
Surviving from the recent War--
Textiles and woollens, built for use in battles--
And Scotland's there inquiring for
The kilt department, I shall not
Be found competing. She can have the lot.


O.S.

* * * * *

THE DOMESTIC PROBLEM.

"Well, I've been to see three of them now," she said. "The first is at
Shepherd's Bush--"

"What pipes!" I ejaculated. "What music! What wild ecstasy!"