presence in our midst are doomed to failure.

* * *

"A search for combined beauty and brains," says _The Daily Mail_, "has been
instituted by _The Weekly Dispatch_." We gather, however, that a good
circulation will also be taken into consideration.

* * *

According to the Technical Secretary of the Civil Aviation Committee a
vehicle has been designed which is equally at home in the air, on land, on
the water and under it. It is said to be distinguishable from Mr. WINSTON
CHURCHILL only by the latter's eloquence.

* * *

We understand that certain members of the betting classes have demanded
that the starting price for coal should be published each day in the early
evening papers.

* * * * *

[Illustration: SCENE.--_Miles from anywhere._

_Tammas._ "COULD YE OBLIGE ME WI' A MATCH, SIR?"

_Stranger._ "I'M AFRAID I'VE ONLY GOT ONE."

_Tammas._ "AY--SHE'LL DO."]