THE THREE PREMIERS MEET ALONE TO-DAY."--_Evening Paper._

We suspect Mr. KEYNES' hand in these headlines.

* * * * *

"Information wanted as to whereabouts of Mrs. J.O. Plonk (Blonk) wife
of J.O. Plonk (Clonk)."--_Advt. in Chinese Paper._

This should go very well with a banjo accompaniment.

* * * * *

THE TRAGEDY OF AN AUTHOR'S WIFE.

"I won't stand it any longer," said Janet intensely, meeting me in the
hall. "Take off your umbrella and listen to me."

"It's off," I replied faintly, perceiving that something was all my fault.
"Can't you hear it singing 'Niagara' in the porch?"

I dropped the shopping on the floor and sat down to watch Janet walking up
and down the room.

"I want," she continued in the tone of one who has had nobody to be
indignant with all day, "a divorce."

"Who for?" I inquired. "Really, darling, we can't afford any more presents
this--"