"THIS IS WHERE HE SWIMS THE RAPIDS. HOW SHALL WE SEND HIM--UP OR DOWN?"]

* * * * *

COX AND BOX.

MY DEAR CHARLES,--Let us talk _Haute Finance_. In other words, let us
indulge in that good old Anglo-Saxon pastime of blackguarding COX AND CO.
It will remind us of the piping days of war. There is too much peace about,
and the gentle and ever-forgiving COX AND CO. expect their customers to be
men of force and character, showing temper from time to time. Everybody
else may be demobilised; I remain a soldier, and as such I have my special
bank. Ah, me! the battles in Charing Cross are not the easy things they
used to be. No longer, as of old, I come fresh to the attack against a mere
underling, worn down by the assaults of wave after wave of brother-officers
attacking, before me. I enter the Territorial Department alone and am taken
on by a master-hand, supported and flanked by a number of unoccupied
subordinates. About the Spring of 1925, when I expect to be the only "T"
left, I anticipate the decisive moment when I shall cross swords or swop
bombs with Sir COX himself. Having bravely encountered "AND CO." these many
years, I shall not be daunted by that gilded knight.

The war having once put me in possession of my COX AND CO., I had very
frequent recourse to them when in need of such solace as only money can
bring. The time arrived when I applied in vain; the money had disappeared.
Though I had no reason to suspect COX AND CO. of being dishonest I noticed
a tone of assuredness and self-complacency in their letters strangely
similar to that in my own, and I _knew_ that I was being dishonest, so I
demanded to see my pass-book. It was a horrid sight, and it gave me
seriously to think. How came it that the side of the book which showed my