me. They had, I think, a genius for turning to account the little things of
life and making the most of them, outwardly at all events. But the
cheerfulness of those who refused to break down, even though it might be
but skin-deep and subject to sudden blight, was still better than the utter
misery and despair which prevailed elsewhere.

Outwardly, then, when the sun shone and one's bones were warm, our company
might seem almost gay at times, joking, laughing, singing, gambling. But
these things covered many a sick heart, and there were times when the
heart-sickness prevailed over all else, and we lay in corners apart, and
loathed our fellows and wished we were dead.

I say we, but, in truth, in these, and all other matters, except the
regular routine of living, I was for a considerable time kept apart from my
fellows by the deafness brought on by the explosion. I lived in a little
soundless world of my own with those dearest to me,--Carette, and my
mother, and my grandfather, and Krok, and Jeanne Falla, and George Hamon.
And if I needed further company, I could people the grim stockade with old
friends out of those four most wonderful books of my grandfather's. And
very grateful was I now for the insistence which had made me read them
times without number, and for the scarcity which had limited me to them
till I knew parts of them almost by heart.

Outwardly, indeed, I might seem loneliest of the company, for cards and
dice had never greatly attracted me, and to risk upon a turn of the one or
a throw of the other the absolute necessaries of life, which were the only
things of value we possessed as a rule, seemed to me most incredible folly.
Possibly the personal value of the stakes added zest to the game, for they
wrangled bitterly at times, and more than once fought to the death over the
proper ownership of articles which would have been dearly bought for an