"The POET LAUREATE," says a weekly paper, "has not written an ode to
British weather." So that can't be the cause of it.

* * *

A Wolverhampton man weighing seventeen stone, in charging another with
assault, said he heard somebody laughing at him, so he looked round. A man
of that weight naturally would.

* * *

"There is work for everybody who likes to work," says Mr. N. GRATTAN DOYLE,
M.P. It is this tactless way of rubbing it in which annoys so many people.

* * *

A contemporary has a letter from a correspondent who signs himself "Tube
Traveller of Twenty Years' Standing." Somebody ought to offer the poor
fellow a seat.

* * *

In connection with the case of a missing railway-porter one railway line
has decided to issue notices warning travellers against touching porters
while they are in motion.

* * *

"The United States," declares the proprietor of a leading New York hotel,