IS MARRIAGE REFORMATORY?


To no other estate are there so many varieties of phases as to that of
matrimony. Like the music of Saint Cæcilia and old Timotheus combined,
it is capable of raising "a mortal to the skies," or of bringing "an
angel down" to the lowest depths of misery. At the best the betrothed
couple can never say with absolute certainty--"After marriage we shall
be happy." The experience of wedded life is alarmingly like that of
dying--each man and woman must know it for himself and herself, and no
other human being can share its trials or its joys.

The mistake the prospective wife makes is in obstinately closing her
eyes to the fact that married life has any trials which are not far
outbalanced by its pleasures. Marriage does not change man or woman.
The impressive ceremony over, the bridal finery laid aside, the last
strain of the wedding-march wafted into space, and the orange-flowers
dead and scentless,--John becomes once more plain, everyday John, with
the same good traits which first won his Mary's heart, and the many
disagreeable characteristics that exasperated his mother and sisters.
And Mary, being a woman, and no more of a saint than is her
life-partner, will also be exasperated. If John is an honest gentleman
who loves Mary, the chances for her happiness depend upon her
common-sense and her love for John. It is utterly impossible to have
too much of the last-named commodity. It will be all needed,
well-blended with the divine attribute of patience, and judiciously
seasoned with woman's especial gift--tact, to enable man and wife to
live together peaceably for one year.