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Treat 'em Rough - Letters from Jack the Kaiser Killer by Ring Lardner
page 15 of 77 (19%)
because this one wispers all night and it would be O.K. if he was
wispering in his sleep or wispering to himself but he isn't.

I didn't turn in till 11 and Nick was buzzing away like a saw buck and I
figured on getting some sleep myself but I hadn't no sooner layed down
when the wispering begun on the other side. First I didn't catch what
he was trying to get at but I heard him the second time all right and he
says "Do you want me to kill?" Well Al for 2 or 3 minutes I couldn't get
enough strenth up to turn over and look at him but the next time he
repeated it over again I couldn't stand it no more so I said "Are you
talking to me?" And what do you think he said Al? He says "I am talking
to God."

Well Al the connection couldn't of been very good you might say because
he kept asking the same question over and over and not getting no answer
but how was I to know when the party at the other end would speak up and
maybe say yes and they wasn't nobody closer to him then me for him to
work on so you can see what a fine nights rest I got Al and this
A.M. I told Shorty Lahey about him and sure enough Al the bird
is a gun man named Tom the Trigger and Shorty says he is a nut that
thinks he is aces up with the all mighty and some times he imagines that
they are telling him to go ahead and shoot and then he takes aim at
whoever is handy.

Well Al this was inspections day and everybody was supposed to have a
clean shave and their hair brushed and all their buttons sowed on and
their beds made up neat and their shoes and mess kits shinned bright and
etc. and Capt. Nash and the lieuts. give us all the double O and some of
the boys got a nice little baling out for the way they looked but I
looked like a soldier ought to look Al and didn't give them no chance to
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