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Treat 'em Rough - Letters from Jack the Kaiser Killer by Ring Lardner
page 18 of 77 (23%)
my eyes open so Corporal Daly come up to me afterwards and asked me
what was the matter so I told him I was to nervous to sleep nights on
acct. of a crazy man bunking next to me and any minute he might take a
notion and shoot me full of holes. I didn't say nothing about Nick the
Blade on the other side of me because he was standing where he could
hear us. So Corporal Daly asked me who I was talking about and I told
him and he laughed and says that if I waited for Castle which is this
other bird's name to start shooting I would probably die of old age or
something because he is one of these objecters that don't beleive in war
and he told them about it the first day we got here and says he objected
to being a soldier. So Capt. Nash asked him if he would object to
unloading a few cars of coal and that is what he has been doing up and
till last Friday and then he begun objecting to a shovel and he says he
would like to join the rest of us and see what it was like and maybe he
would loose his objections. So now they are giveing him a week to make
up his mind what he is going to do and he is talking it over all the
while with the Lord and if the Lord tells him its O.K. to kill people
why well and good but he won't practice on us because in the first place
he hasn't no gun and if he had one he wouldn't know if it was to shoot
with or stir your coffee.

So afterwards I told Shorty Lahey he had made a mistake about Castle
and he says "All right and if he is a objecter it is up to us to talk
him out of it." So after supper tonight Castle was seting right near me
in the recreation room and Shorty come up to him and says "Well Castle
haven't you been able to get that party on the wire yet" so Castle asked
him what he meant and he says he heard Castle was waiting for a message
from somewheres telling him if he should be a soldier or not so Castle
didn't answer and begun to read. So Shorty says "You ain't the only one
that objects to war but we got to make the world safe for Democrats and
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