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Treat 'em Rough - Letters from Jack the Kaiser Killer by Ring Lardner
page 9 of 77 (11%)
back and I been with him about 3 years.

So the officer asked me if I ever done anything besides pitch so I told
him about the day I played the outfield in Terre Haute when Burns and
Stewart shut their eyes going after a fly ball and their skulls come
together and it sounded like a freight wreck and they was both layed out
so I and Lefty Danvers took their place and in the 8th. inning I come up
with 2 on and hit a curve ball off big Jack Rowan and only for the fence
that ball wouldn't of made no stops this side of Indpls.

So then the officer says "Yes but didn't you do something when you
wasn't playing ball?" so I told him a pitcher don't have to do nothing
only set on the bench or hit fungos once in a while or warm up when it
looks like the guy in there is beggining to wobble. So he says "Well I
guess I will put you down as a pitcher and when we need one in a hurry
we will know where to find one." But I don't know when they would need a
pitcher Al unless it was to throw one of them bombs and believe me when
it comes to doing that I will make a sucker out of the rest of these
birds because if my arm feels O.K. they's nobody got better control and
if they tell me to stick one in a German's right eye that is where I
will put it and not in their stomach or miss them all together like I
was a left hander or something.

[Illustration: Shut their eyes going after a fly ball, their skulls came
together and it sounded like a freight wreck (p. 20).]

Well Al we done a little training Friday and Saturday but today was the
first day we realy went to it. First of course we got up and dressed and
then they was 10 minutes of what they call upseting exercises and then
come breakfast which was oatmeal and steak and bread and coffee. The
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