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A String of Amber Beads by Martha Everts Holden
page 53 of 70 (75%)
have no business to sever the bond that unites them. The promise to
take each other for "better or for worse" must be regarded in both
readings of the clause. If the "worse" comes along we have no right to
ignore it because the "better" has failed. If your husband is a
drunkard, all the more reason for you to stand by him if you are a good
woman. If he is cruel and abusive, you need not put your life in
danger by staying under his roof, but you need not throw him over and
get another husband. If he goes into the gutter, pull him out, and
know that your experience is only a big dose of the "worse" you
promised to take along with the "better." It is the quinine with the
honey, and you have no right to reject it. There are 10,000 things
that work discord in married life that a little tact and forbearance
would dissipate, as a steady wind will blow away gnats. The trouble
with all of us is, we make too much of trifles. We nurse them, and
feed them, and magnify them, until from gnats they grow to be buzzards
with their beaks in our hearts. Not for one sin, nor seven sins, nor
seventy sins, forsake the friend you chose from all the world to make
your own. A good woman will save anything but a liar, and God's grace
is adequate, in time, for even him. I say unto wives, be
large-hearted, wide in your charity, generous, not paltry, nor
exacting, (exaction has murdered more loves than Herod murdered
babies!) companionable, forbearing and true, and stand by your husbands
through everything. And I say unto men, be _men_! Don't choose a
wife, in the first place, for the mere exterior of a pretty face and
form. Be as alert in the choice of a wife as you are in a bargain.
You don't invest in a house just because it looks well, or buy a suit
of clothes at first sight, or dash on change and snatch at the first
deal. After you are once married stand by your choice like a man. If
you must have your beer, don't sneak out of it on a clove and a lie;
carefully weigh the cost, and if you conclude to risk everything for
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