LIX.

BOYS, YOU KNOW I LIKE YOU.

Boys, you know I like you and will stand a good deal of your swaggering
ways. I like to see how fresh you are, and do not want to have you
salted down too early by the processes of life. But one thing let me
ask you. Don't wear silk hats before the down is fully apparent upon
your chin. If there is an embarrassing sight left to one grown wan and
worn in watching the foolishness of folly, it is the sight of a
stripling in a plug hat. I would rather see a yearling colt hauling
lumber, or a babe in arms scanning Homer. It is cruel; it is
premature. Be a boy until you are fit to be a man, and hold to a boy's
mode of dress at least until you are old enough to command the respect
of sensible girls by something more notable than cigarette smoking and
athletic sports.




LX.

WHAT TO DO WITH GROWLERS.

I often hear people making a big fuss about little things. My path in
life leads me among many "kickers" and many "growlers." Do you know
what I would like to do with some of these malcontents and whiners? I
would like to send them up for a week to watch life in the county
hospital. I would like to seat them by a bedside where a noble woman
lies dying all alone of a terrible disease. I would like to have them