Capt. Hagberd (_Eager_). Yes, my dear. (_Slily_) Of course you saw me
come back.

Bessie. Oh, yes. I did see you. You had something under your coat.

Capt. H. (_Anxiously_). It was only a kettle, my dear. A tin
water-kettle. I am glad I thought of it just in time. (_Winks, nods_.)
When a husband gets back from his work he needs a lot of water for a
wash. See? (_Dignified_.) Not that Harry'll ever need to do a hand's
turn after he comes home... (_Falters--casts stealthy glances on all
sides_).... tomorrow.

Bessie (_Looks up, grave_). Captain Hagberd, have you ever thought that
perhaps your son will not. . .

Capt. H. (_Paternally_). I've thought of everything, my dear--of
everything a reasonable young couple may need for housekeeping. Why,
I can hardly turn about in my room up there, the house is that full.
(_Rubs his hands with satisfaction_.) For my son Harry--when he comes
home. One day more.

Bessie (_Flattering_). Oh, you are a great one for bargains. (_Captain
Hagberd delighted_.) But, Captain Hagberd--if--if--you don't know what
may happen--if all that home you've got together were to be wasted--for
nothing--after all. (_Aside_.) Oh, I can't bring it out.

Capt. H. (_Agitated; flings arms up, stamps feet; stuttering_). What?
What d'ye mean? What's going to happen to the things?

Bessie (_Soothing_). Nothing! Nothing! Dust--or moth--you know. Damp,