"1,000 EGGS IN ONE WHISKER."

_Daily Paper._

A much worse case than that of LEAR'S old man with a beard, who said
it was just as he feared.

* * * * *

"For all we know, Helen of Troy's best friends might have said,
'Helen has style and knows how to make the most of her good
points; but, honest, now, do you think she should have got the
apple?'"

_Evening Paper._

Certainly not. That's why Paris gave it to Aphrodite.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _First Ancient (with morbid fear of growing deaf,
breaking long silence)._ "THERE--IT'S COME AT LAST! YOU'VE BEEN
TALKING ALL THIS TIME AND I AIN'T HEARD A SINGLE WORD."

_Second Ancient._ "BAIN'T BIN TALKIN'--BIN CHEWIN'."]

* * * * *