Aw can nah have a spree to misel?
Aw can treat mi old mates wi' a glass;
An' aw sha'nt ha' to come home an' tell
My old lass, ha' aw've shut all mi brass.
Some fowk say, when a chap's getten wed,
He should nivver keep owt thro' his wife;
If he does awve oft heard 'at it's sed,
'At it's sure to breed trouble an' strife;
If it does aw'm net baan to throw up,
Tho' aw'd mich rayther get on withaat;
But who wodn't risk a blow up,
For a paand 'at th' wife knows nowt abaat.

Aw hid it i' th' coil hoil last neet,
For fear it dropt aat o' mi fob,
Coss aw knew, if shoo happened to see 't,
At mi frolic wod prove a done job.
But aw'll gladden mi een wi' its face,
To mak sure at its safe in its nick;--
But aw'm blest if ther's owt left i' th' place!
Why, its hook'd it as sure as aw'm wick.
Whear its gooan to's a puzzle to me,
An' who's taen it aw connot mak aat,
For it connot be th' wife, coss you see
It's a paand 'at shoo knew nowt abaat.

But thear shoo is, peepin' off th' side,
An' aw see'at shoo's all on a grin;
To chait her aw've monny a time tried,
But I think it's nah time to give in.