me sacer Aegidius Musarum fana colentem
aegide defendit, perque ignea tela, per hostes
incolumem vexitque tuens rursusque revexit.




MUSICAL DEGREES

Too oft there grows a painful thorn the floweret's stalk upon:
Behind each cupboard's gilded doors there lurks a Skeleton:
The crumpled roseleaf mocks repose, beneath the bed of down:
In proof of which attend the tale of Bach Beethoven Brown.

Beethoven Brown could play and sing before he learnt to crawl:
Piano, bones, or ophicleide--he played upon them all!
Some talk of Paderewski, or of Dr Joachim--
These artists meritorious are, but can't compare with him.

No faults or errors technical his Symphonies deface:
He calculates in counterpoint, he thinks in thoroughbass:
Composers of celebrity--musicians of renown--
Confess that they're inferior far to Bach Beethoven Brown.

As conquerors, their triumphs won, new fields before them see,
So Mr Brown resolved to have a Musical Degree:
Some say that it the title was and others say the gown
That captive took the soaring soul of Bach Beethoven Brown.

But ah! our Statues grovelling command their candidates