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Olympian Nights by John Kendrick Bangs
page 5 of 130 (03%)
which the newspapers of my own country were describing with some
vividness, I chanced upon the base of the far-famed Mount Olympus.
Night was coming on apace and I was tired, having been led during the
day upon a wild-goose chase by my guide, who had assured me that he
had definitely located the scene of hostilities between the Greeks
and the Turks. He had promised that for a consideration I should
witness a conflict between the contending armies which in its
sanguinary aspects should surpass anything the world had yet known.
Whether or not it so happened that the armies had been booked for a
public exhibition elsewhere, unknown to the talented bandit who was
acting as my courier, I am not aware, but, as the event transpired,
the search was futile, and another day was wasted. Most annoying, too,
was the fact that I dared not manifest the impatience which I
naturally felt. I am not remarkable as a specimen of the strong man;
quite the reverse indeed, for, while I am by no means a weakling, I am
no adept in the fistic art. Hence, when my guide, Hippopopolis by
name, as the sun sank behind the western hills, informed me that I
was again to be disappointed, the fact that he stands six feet two in
his stockings, when he wears them, and has a pleasing way of bending
crowbars as a pastime, led me to conceal the irritation which I felt.

"It's all right, Hippopopolis," I said, swallowing my wrath. "It's all
right. We've had a good bit of exercise, anyhow, and that, after all,
is the chief desideratum to a man of a sedentary occupation. How many
miles have we walked?"

"Oh, about forty-three," he said, calmly. "A short distance, your
Excellency."

"Very--very short," said I, rubbing my aching calves. "In my own
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