Students fair who thirst for knowledge, athletes
true who 'pots' despise.
It is well for thee, sweet Clio, at their harmless
tastes to sneer,
At their love of cats and croquet, their antipathy
to beer;
But as soon as every College has surrendered to the fair,
Life up here will be perfection, we shall breathe
ambrosial air;
For the problem of past ages will be solved, and
we shall find
The superior powers of woman, both in body and in mind.
She shall teach us how to study, how to ride,
and run, and row;
How to box and play at cricket; how the heavy
weight to throw;
How to shoot the trembling pigeon; how the wily rat
to slay;
How at football and at racquets; how at whist and
chess to play;
How to drive the rapid tandem; how to jump, and how
to walk;
(For young women, trust me, Clio, can do something
more than talk)
How to climb the Alps in summer; how in winter time
to skate;
How to hold the deadly rifle; how a yacht to navigate;
How to make the winning hazard with an effort sure
and strong;
How to play the maddening comet, how to sing a comic song;