ourselves.' This ends my headitorial."

Great applause followed this masterpiece of journalistic literature, and
the Sand Piper proceeded:

"I will next read the column of news, notes, and social events, as
collected by our energetic and capable young reporter, the Sand Crab:

* * * * *

"'The Queen and her lady-in-waiting went bathing in the ocean this
morning. Our noble Queen was costumed in white, trimmed with blue, and
the Sand Witch in dark blue trimmed with red. Both noble ladies squealed
when a large breaker knocked them over. The whole court rushed to their
rescue, and no permanent damage resulted.

"Three gentlemen courtiers of this court, who reside in the same castle,
had ice-cream for dinner last night. The colors were pink and white. It
was exceeding good.

"A very young princess, a sister of our beloved Queen, went walking
yesterday afternoon with her maid of honor. The princess wore a big
white hat with funny ribbon bunches on it. Also white shoes.

"Mr. Sears has had his back fence painted. (We don't know any Mr. Sears,
and he hasn't any back fence, but we are making up now, as our real news
has given out and our column isn't full.)

"Mrs. Black spent Sunday with her mother-in-law, Mrs. Green. (See
above.)