and amuse themselves with politics. Farming's a lonesome life; and
they've been against the shell game before."




THE CHAIR OF PHILANTHROMATHEMATICS


"I see that the cause of Education has received the princely gift of
more than fifty millions of dollars," said I.

I was gleaning the stray items from the evening papers while Jeff
Peters packed his briar pipe with plug cut.

"Which same," said Jeff, "calls for a new deck, and a recitation by
the entire class in philanthromathematics."

"Is that an allusion?" I asked.

"It is," said Jeff. "I never told you about the time when me and Andy
Tucker was philanthropists, did I? It was eight years ago in Arizona.
Andy and me was out in the Gila mountains with a two-horse wagon
prospecting for silver. We struck it, and sold out to parties in
Tucson for $25,000. They paid our check at the bank in silver--a
thousand dollars in a sack. We loaded it in our wagon and drove
east a hundred miles before we recovered our presence of intellect.
Twenty-five thousand dollars doesn't sound like so much when you're
reading the annual report of the Pennsylvania Railroad or listening to
an actor talking about his salary; but when you can raise up a wagon