Some time ago I was accidentally thrown into the im company of a number
of workmen, who were just wondering how to pass the remainder of the
dinner hour agreeably; and, as they were all indulging in the favourite
after dinner pipe, with one exception, it was proposed that this one,
whom they called Amos, should tell them one of his stories. Amos,
nothing loth, and, evidently accustomed to occupy the position of a
story teller, without any apology commenced:--

"Nah, aw dooan't think for a minit, 'at yo all knew this tinklin' Tommy,
'at aw'm gooin to tell yo abaght. Nowt o'th' soort! Its net to be
expected! But aw dar say yo've all known a tinklin chap o' some
sooart--one o' them 'ats allus boddin an' doin jobs they niver sarved
ther time to--a sooart o' jack-o'-all-trades, one 'at con turn his hand
to owt ommost. Nah, aw like a chap o' that sooart, if he doesn't carry
things too far: but when he begins to say 'at he con build a haase as
weel as a mason, an' mak a kist o' drawers as weel as a joiner, or
praich a sarmon as weel as th' parson--or playa bazzoon, or spetch a
pair o' clogs better nor ony man breathin--then, aw say, tak care an'
ha' nowt to do wi' him. It isn't i'th' natur ov ony body to be able to
do ivery thing, an' yo 'll oft find 'at them 'at con do all bi ther
tawk, con varry seldom do owt reight.

This Tinklin Tom, 'at aw knew, lived at Northaaram, an' he'd managed to
mak fowk believe 'at he wor a varry cliver chap, an' whoiver wanted owt
doin they wor sure to send for Tom; an' varry oft he did better nor
like, to say 'at he had to do it aght ov his own heead; an' if iver he
made a mess o' owt, it wor sure to be th' fault o' th' stuff, or else
them 'at held th' leet: it wor niver Tommy's.